As a parent, one of the most difficult tasks that you need to face would be disciplining your child. The difficulty would vary from case to case, but it is always a challenge. Some parents find it really hard and then there are those who are misguided on how to do it. They do not know the
right steps that they ought to follow in order to maintain proper discipline in their child.
Tips for Maintaining Discipline in Your Child
We have mentioned that maintaining discipline in your child is not the easiest thing in the world to do. But with the right information and guidance you should be able to do it. To help you out we have listed a few tips here that you can follow in order to discipline your child in the proper manner.
Fit Your Techniques with Your Child’s Temperament
There are many disciplining techniques out there. It doesn’t matter which technique that you use, the important thing is that you ought to make sure that it fits well with your child’s temperament. You have to know who your child is and what are his/her temperament and behaviour. You should also be aware of talents and weaknesses of your child. When you know those things then you can choose the right technique that would fit well with your child’s personality. But you should never aim to use your disciplining techniques in order to transform your child’s behaviour and temperament. Do not aim to turn a timid child into a noisy one or vice versa, because it would never work.
Communicate with the Child
When you are dealing with older children then communicating with them when it comes to your disciplining plans and techniques would help a lot. When they are old enough to understand things then they would know that the techniques that you want to try out would be for their benefit. You should never use a technique all of a sudden without any warning. You should sit down with your children and tell them the technique that you want to use, why you want to use it and what benefits you hope to accomplish. If they are old enough then they should understand. They would help you out when they see that it is for their benefit.
How do you behave when your children misbehave? Do you lose your temper? Do you lash out at them? Many parents lose their cool when they are dealing with children. You should never behave that way. If you want your children to behave and show that they have discipline, then you have to behave as well. Losing your temper and lashing out at them verbally is not going to be a good idea.
You should always treat your children with respect. Even when you are disciplining them you should never lose your temper. When you do lose your temper, then you should apologize to them.
You Have to be Consistent
One of the most important things that you should remember when you are dealing with disciplining your child is consistency. All of your efforts and good intentions would go to waste if you do not follow through and show that you enforce the consequences and punishments. If a child sees that you will not punish them for a bad behaviour even for once, then they will get the idea that they can get away with it. You have to show them that all of their actions would have consequences and that you will be enforcing punishments always and all the time.
One instance where you will really have to show that you are serious and consistent with your aim to discipline your children is when they misbehave in public. You should never give in if your children throws in a tantrum and starts to misbehave in public. If you give in to them during their outbursts in public, they would remember that and would use that all the time so they can get what they want.
Get Over with It
When children misbehave and get the consequence of that bad behaviour, that should be the end of it. Don’t go on lecturing them and reminding them about the bad thing that they did. Once they have felt the full consequence of their action, you should help them to get over it and move on to another activity.
Understanding the Level of Your Child’s Development
Make sure that you have a clear understanding of the level of your child’s development. Some parents make the mistake of asking for behaviours that are beyond the capability and the understanding of their child. So before you go out and make demands on the behaviour of your child, you have to understand on what level he/she is at.
Look for the Reasons
Children follow a certain pattern of behaviour for a reason. If your child has been doing a certain inappropriate behaviour over and over, that means there is a certain problem that goes deep. You have to take a look closely, so you can discover what that reason is. Your child might be having problems at school or might be stressed about how life in your home is. There are so many reasons that could cause inappropriate behaviour. You should do more than just to ask the child directly. More often than not, the child would be unaware of those reasons.
Nothing Will Work All the Time
You just have to accept the fact that sometimes things would not go your way. Even if you have the best disciplining technique in place and you know all the right things that you need to do, sometimes things will not go your way. Don’t get upset with yourself when that happens. Even the best disciplining techniques fail sometimes. What you need to do is learn the lessons and then to move on. You will not help your child if you dwell on your failures.
Pay Attention to Behaviour That You Like
Because of the aim to discipline their children, some parents become too focused on the bad behaviour and the things that they don’t want. But that’s a negative way of looking at things. Chances are that the examples of negative behaviour of your child are few and infrequent and when you focused on those things then you miss out on a chance to have a real connection with your child. You should reward good behaviour even if that just means giving them some praise or an encouraging word or two. That can go a long way when it comes to encouraging your child towards having a good behaviour.
Instead of telling your children what they should not do, try telling them what they ought to do instead. Redirecting their energy to activities that are positive and constructive can help you out in a long way when it comes to disciplining them. You have to accept the fact that they are restless and nothing that you can do would contain that.
These are just some of the ideas that you need to keep in mind when you want to maintain the discipline of you child.